More Annoying Buzzwords

More Annoying Buzzwords

2 June 2017

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We’ve all been out and about at a few networking events over the past month and, whilst we love getting to meet new people and learn new things, we couldn’t help but overhear something awful.

Yes, it’s those buzzwords again. We have no idea why people feel the need to deliver 50 words when 10 words will do, or why they feel the need to over-complicate their speech with high falutin’ jargon. Do you not hear yourself and think you sound ridiculous when you talk about “touching base” or “cross-pollinating best practice”?

Prepare yourself for an almighty eye roll as we take a look at yet more annoying office buzzwords.

Ping me

via GIPHY

Can you not just ask for an email? Ping makes us think of someone flicking rubber bands across the office. Or the noise a microwave makes when your terrible meal for one is ready. It’s definitely not an email though.

Thought leadership

via GIPHY

Are you … reading my mind? Are you getting me to do things for you via thought? What else could this possibly mean and how is it relevant to the workplace?

Pivot

via GIPHY

If you’re not thinking of Ross carrying the couch up the stairs in Friends, you are not human. Apparently, this started off as a basketball term that has now wheedled its way in to useless business vocabulary.

Millennials

via GIPHY

We’re not sure if this is actually a buzzword, but we’re definitely sick of hearing about it. The snowflake generation who want sky-high wages for zero work have a bad reputation for laziness and hurt feelings. Enough already!

Nowcast

via GIPHY

It’s like a forecast but for now, get it?! We’ve given up on planning for the future, it’s all about the here and now. The phrase originates from weathermen in the 1980s who could only really tell viewers what the weather was like now.

Push tolerance

via GIPHY

This definitely sounds like some sort of laxative. What is really means is: “the capacity of a strategy or idea to withstand resistance, usually from someone further up the hierarchy.” Couldn’t you just say that then?

Buy in

via GIPHY

Yuck, this one really gives us the creeps as it seems to be everywhere at the moment. It essentially translates to an agreement on a course of action, but you can just imagine the pinstripe shirts and garish ties all nodding away to this one.

Swim lane

via GIPHY

This means a specific responsibility within your company, but all it really does is conjure up less than flattering mental images of your colleagues in itsy-bitsy swimwear. Eek.

 

 

 

 

Written By Mary Palmer

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